5 thoughts on “Shame… not guilt as primary issue”

  1. As soon as I saw the headline on the conversation with Michele I knew I had something to say. Not because it would be more profound, simply that I’ve lived under its shadow for a very long time, but here’s the thing. Although I’d heard messages, had counselling, it was only in the last year or so during a period of therapy I heard or read this. Guilt comes when we make a mistake. Shame comes when we think we are the mistake. What Michele laid out has been so layered over with guilt that we never get to a loving God. How to take this forward to others who so desperately need to hear it.

    Certain that Michele and yourself and Gayle could add much. I know I would love more conversation. The effects of this lie has stolen everything that God had given us for good. Thank you both .

    Martin,cut short or out,this really got me going. Not sure where or how! Know Brene’ Browns work a little.

    1. Elly. A HUGE thankyou. What you wrote: ‘Guilt comes when we make a mistake. Shame comes when we think we are the mistake’, is simply incredible. Incisive and showed me for the first time the core difference between the two.

  2. Elly your insight is really amazing. Thank YOU for adding your voice to this conversation. It’s a topic deeply on my heart to have more conversations about, to explore the edges of… I’m a big Brene Brown fan as well. It’s something so foundational and profoundly needed in most current day expressions of Christendom, that I’ve had experience with at least.

    Again THANK you for sharing your heart and insight. When I lived in Africa there was a local proverb that said “sticks burn brighter together”. We need your voice… this is a message that cannot be carried alone. Shame happens in relationship with others in the context of community. And so does healing.

  3. I was reminded of a very honest conversation between Andy Glover and Stephen Hill in February in which our nakedness in the garden, the grabbing of fig leaves evolves. It is developed in a very beautiful way ,was journaled and I guess stored in my head till it found a connection.

    I wondered if as well as individually,even nations try to cover their shame.

    Fig leaves will never be enough. Only Jesus is enough.

  4. Michele,I have literally just read your response to my comment.They say(I don’t know who they are)that timing makes a difference.It was totally amazing to me what you wrote and to receive your kindness and encouragement to keep going.Thank you .

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