God is… humble

The problem with theology (word about / study of God) is that it normally starts with God and works from there. But what do we know about ‘God’? As Barth said ‘we cannot say God by saying man (sic) in a loud voice’… So we have to be ever so careful when we talk of the ‘wrath’ of God as if God is me when I am angry but only more so! Likewise ‘forgiveness’ cos if we are not careful we end up with an appeasing of God. So much theology starts with God and then all the ‘omni’ words but they are often articulated without reference to God’s character – I still think somewhat reliant on the ‘Unmoved Mover’ of the Hellenistic world. Take omniscience – God knows all things, but under conventional theology it is closely aligned to predestination . How about the analogy of a master chess player who knows how to respond to every move, only multiplied beyond measure, so that God works toward the one goal with precision, responding to every move and every opposition so that there will ultimately be ‘the reconciliation of all things, things in heaven and on earth’. As one author puts it ‘Love wins’.

As Jesus is the revelation of God we have to start there, and we also add that Jesus is the image of the new / true humanity. Hence, we can affirm that ‘God is love’. I mentally assent to that, but am provoked to believe it – that I think is a life-long journey for us all. However, I do think I believe (cos I am stunned so many times) that ‘God is humble’. I have a long way to go in my faith and I guess if I believe God is humble it it probably a step on the way to understanding that ‘God is love’. Let’s try a few verses from Paul (with my small edit!):

God is patient; God is kind; God is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. God does not insist on her/his own way; God is not irritable; God keeps no record of wrongs; God does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoices in the truth. God bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

We so often want a big God – big defined our way. A God who demonstrates not simply who s/he is but demonstrates that we are so right. God is BIG but does not ‘big’ her/himself up. Humility – so key in Scripture, and given the humility of God I am shocked at how arrogant I can be – knowing this, knowing that.

The pre-Pauline Philippian hymn speaks strongly of the humility of God; conventional translations have something along the lines of ‘although he was in the form of God… he humbled / emptied himself’ giving the impression that Jesus did not act in a God-like way. (And of course this plays out when we come to the cross with the view of justice demanded (by God) and mercy offered through sacrifice / appeasement).

[I am not engaging with the passage along the lines of Andrew Perriman who does not view the passage as a pre-Pauline hymn – a fascinating take for those interested… and my point below is not dependent on what the passage is at core. Andrew’s view is put forward in his book but you can get an insight to it here:
https://www.postost.net/2025/07/whats-pauls-letter-philippians-all-about.]

I appreciate we are not all Greek readers but let me simply write below what the manuscripts say:

ὃς ἐν μορφῇ θεοῦ ὑπάρχων οὐχ ἁρπαγμὸν ἡγήσατο τὸ εἶναι ἴσα θεῷ…
who in the form of God being (no ‘in spite of’, ‘although’ or any such words).

Why did Jesus not grasp at position? Why did Jesus humble himself? Why did Jesus become a slave?Why did Jesus become obedient, even to death? We have to answer it with: because he was God-like.

God is humble. Maybe I am immature and need to deeply bow under the biblical statement that ‘God is love’; but I am hopeful if I know that the God who is revealed in Jesus is humble maybe that will deal with any residual arrogance and one day I will simply need to say ‘God is love’.

Clothing!

Never been a fashion icon nor with any desire to try that path. Gayle can dress me easily – all she needs to do is arrange what is in the top of a drawer as I pick the first thing every morning (tempted to make this a ‘no-comment’ post). Way back in time, 1996/7 I was meditating a lot on sack-cloth and sensed that one day I would need to add it to my great range of clothing… BTW one of my heroes Gustavo Gutiérrez once travelled in the USA and in one place his host noticed that each day he was wearing the same clothes and was evidently washing them each night. They bought him a new shirt which he gratefully received with the words ‘Thank you so much I know a brother back home who really needs a new shirt’.

Back in the 90s I used to run reasonable distances with a stop-watch (I still run now but am on the edge of ditching the stop-watch for a calendar, feeling good if I can complete 5kms the same day that I started) and I could still go back to the same part of the road when I ‘heard’, ‘it is time to get the sack cloth’. I managed to track some down and Kay (neighbour over the road) quickly put a make shift shirt and shorts together. My new wardrobe.

Within weeks there was a leadership conference for a certain movement (from memory almost 1000 leaders?). I was always due to attend and showed up, changed into the new wardrobe and joined in all the meetings. A number of questions were asked (understandably so) but I did not respond beyond – just felt the right thing to do. Without asking the host of the conference gave me the platform at the end of the conference.

It is time for new clothing, the clothing of repentance and humility is the clothing that we have to wear. We see walls that have been built but have to take responsibility for the building of the walls. We must go beyond our walls and will meet others on the ground of humility. Tonight the ‘train’ that brought us here has terminated and is not moving, we have to get out of the train of convention and find new transport to take us forward. Relationships for the sake of identity have to give way to relationships for the sake of territory.

That was the summary of what I brought.

Some time later I met with a couple who were talking to me about that evening and suddenly she had an outburst… (excuse the language) ‘They have bloody well started to move the scenery behind the train to give the appearance the train is still on the move’.

1998 – the date of the conference – to 2025 and a lot of water has gone under the bridge since then; probably if I revisited that ‘word’ I might well express it somewhat differently. But clothing is so important.

I had a woman in Chiswick, London come to me at the end of a meeting asking if I would pray for her and her work. She said she was a fashion designer. I did not reply with ‘you’ve come to the right person’, but with ‘you are in a field of work that is so ideal for a believer… clothing is a sign of the resurrection’. Paul, talking of the resurrection body described it like clothing and he said the one aspect regarding death was he did not want to appear naked. Clothing is not simply for warmth and modesty but to express who we are. I said to that woman if you can feel the pull of the resurrection you will design clothes that when there is a show models will want to wear your design for they will feel good about themselves.

Maybe we need a ‘revival’ in the fashion industry, with great designs… and some sack-cloth?

Humility is so necessary. It is the major protective clothing against the devouring work of the adversary:

And all of you must clothe yourselves with humility in your dealings with one another, for
“God opposes the proud
but gives grace to the humble.”
Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that he may exalt you in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you. Discipline yourselves; keep alert. Like a roaring lion your adversary the devil prowls around, looking for someone to devour (1 Peter 5:5-8).

But God gives all the more grace; therefore it says,
“God opposes the proud
but gives grace to the humble.”
Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you (Jas. 4:6-7).

I say to everyone among you not to think of yourself more highly than you ought to think but to think with sober judgment (Rom. 12:3)… For if those who are nothing think they are something, they deceive themselves (Gal. 6:3).

The sack cloth is no longer in the wardrobe, but the clothing of humility should not be discarded, and we must avoid moving the background scenery to give an impression of movement.

Up and down… and beyond

Reflecting back the years 1998-2008 were years when I thought ‘this is what I was born for’. 1990 we had a visit from a prophet from the USA and something was imparted. We were meeting in a school hall and there was an explosion of life. A literal ‘roar’ went up. 1994 came along and what became known as ‘the Toronto blessing’ impacted so many places in the UK… a little later and news of what was happening in Pensacola came through, then in our little pond ‘Marsham Street’ meetings began (1997) in Westminster. I remember the many responses to faith, baptisms where people were not simply drenched in water but in the Spirit and had to be dragged out of the pool. Heady days… expectations were simple, revival was here and would only grow.

A few years later Roger Mitchell read to me an email that he had received. In summary the contents were that this person knew Roger from years back and he wrote to outline how he had lost faith and lost his way but had now found his way back to the Lord. He wrote that he was not sure what he would do now with church as he observed ‘it was not public like it used to be’. At the close of the communication he said that he was living and working in Leatherhead, Surrey. The town where I lived and ‘church was not public like it used to be’. At that time one of the most prominent churches in the UK was meeting in Leatherhead, renting the largest building in the town. Inside that building one would regularly be experiencing ‘touching heaven, changing earth’ (to quote a song)… but outside?

I lived prior to Leatherhead in a town of some 11,000 people in a Christian community of around 600 people. A BIG percentage. Inside that community everything was awesome. No need to own a lawnmower – one person can ‘own’ it and numbers of us can use it… I walk past 5, 6 doors to the 7th where someone who was ‘in’ lived. Great testimony… but how was that seen by those in the previous 5 or households?

One of the most progressive (and large) churches meeting inside but not visible. And a further challenge – Mr. Scott lived at the same time in Leatherhead – so his faith was not visible?

Anyway that communication was toward the end of the 1998-2008 period, so back to that time.

In the midst of the Marsham Street season I strongly felt this needs to be taken to cities up and down the UK, and eventually one city opened her doors and over the next few years in the context of team we invested 12 weeks into the city of Leeds. I never requested an invite anywhere but numerous cities followed, at one time there were 3 teams running, I wrote two books, Germany, France, Sweden, West Coast of the USA, Brazil and other places also opened. As the Spanish say ‘I was in my salsa’.

I carried a simple approach – the church in the city / region should find that in their unity they were present for the sake of that locality; prayer at every level (and with a focus on how the effects of history can be undone) and lo and behold… well the overriding name will explain – ‘Sowing seeds for Revival’. It was in that period of time that I gained an understanding of ‘land’. With over 1200 references in Scripture not a minor theme, yet if one were to ask most Bible-oriented Christians what word they associate with ‘heaven’ they would answer with ‘hell’. Ask someone to read Scripture with no previous exposure and ask them the same question and the answer would be ‘earth’. The ‘big’ aspect of prayer as instructed by Jesus was ‘on earth as in heaven’. I began to understand how what has taken place in history is what shapes a place spiritually. After Jesus had encountered Jerusalem where he was not accepted (the place that had always rejected the prophets) we come to a few enlightening verses at the end of John 10:

He went away again across the Jordan to the place where John had been baptising earlier, and he remained there. Many came to him, and they were saying, “John performed no sign, but everything that John said about this man was true.” And many believed in him there (emphases added).

So many references to geography with one verse indicating what had taken place there to make this a place of response – John had been baptising there. A lightbulb moment for me with the understanding that land has to be healed from previous wounds and bondages, and it also opened up the meaning of Jesus submitting to John’s baptism.

Thus years of ‘sowing seeds for revival’ began. Revival – in the USA used more to describe what happens inside a meeting context; in the UK with the history of Wesley /Whitfield and more recently ‘the Welsh revival’ or the ‘Hebridean revival’ the impact on the community with deep sorrowful confession of sin and resultant conversions, so that miners no longer swore and beat the donkeys in the mines, or harvests left unharvested as attendance at church overtook every other responsibility.

I am very grateful for meeting James Thwaites who was someone who helped me see that the church is beyond the congregation and is to be embedded in and through all of society. To borrow Eugene Peterson’s language the people of God have to move into ‘the neighbourhood’ to such a level that their glory can be seen – full of grace and truth. There is the deeper challenge. Glory is what we have fallen short of (the core definition of sin – ἁμαρτάνω – to miss the mark).

I perceive that this realisation concerning the transformation of our world is on the agenda of many who have had a similar journey to my own… sadly a model has come up that outlines the need to have believers rise into the top 3% of various spheres to bring about change. I perceive the kingdom of God is not of that order, indeed for some 20+ years I have sought to outline how ‘sharia law’ is but a mirror of that ‘top down’ view, and as I believe that there is no stronger body of people on earth than the body of Christ… thus what is within that body will produce a harvest – hence sharia law draws from the well of christendom.

Wales, Lewis – not as simple as bad people in the pubs and then convicted and then in the chapels. Sure there was that element, but visit, for example Wales, and a great number of chapels were built or enlarged in the 1890’s – to accommodate the children from previous revivals, but with the overriding Calvinist theology conversion was wholly a work of God so until conviction comes there can be no salvation (of course ‘salvation’ is a work of God, but like a drowning person to whom I throw a life-line that person has to grab it. Later that person would be foolish to say ‘I saved myself’ – their part would be simply – thank God someone saved me. Oh and in Acts we do have the phrase ‘save yourselves’!!!!).

We are in a different era. ‘Revival’ as defined by our history I suspect is history other than some further outbreaks, but the body of Christ (using that term rather than ‘church’ as often we use the word we all know and make a direct equivalence with what we know) engaging in the cultural mess of our world I see as the future.

I loved that era that I am reflecting on. I could give so many stories – hundreds of watches and clocks that restarted that were broken and had been put away – at one point in Brazil I asked that people went home dug them out and if they had restarted they should bring them the next evening and we would line the platform with them. I even had a story told me (from the UK) of a clock that had the pendulum removed as the ‘tick’ was intrusive to the room, it was taken down for redecoration and lo and behold the clock started again ‘tick, tock’ with no pendulum. Signs of the start of time, not the repetition of the past.

But as for all of us we project forward from where we are. Looking back is better (‘this is that’) but we do not have that luxury. Inevitably I still project forward – I hope I do it with a less strong viewpoint now than then.

Prayer, a complex partnership

I don’t find prayer easy. My mind wanders. And I led prayer teams here there and everywhere. Ah well God chooses the foolish ones?

My best rhythm is when I get out and walk and toward the end of the time felt a challenge that on a certain area of concern I was praying too much! Jesus warned us not to pray too much (‘do not pray like the pagans who think they will be heard with their many words’) and I realised that a percentage of my praying was due to anxiety over the situation and a lack of trust in God. If I pray more… The big issue was my anxieties – deal with them, the lack of trust in God and pray less.

Prayer is so complicated. Why pray? A standard response is that God does not need prayer (after all God is omnipotent and can do whatever) and that it is ultimately for us. I think that view is in error though as I have indicated in the previous paragraph prayer has a direct impact on changing us. However much it conflicts with our view on ‘omnipotence’ and ‘sovereignty’ God needs prayer. There is an agreement between us and God that is required. That key part of the ‘Lord’s prayer’ indicates a world view that the will of God is not being done: ‘Let your kingdom come, let your will be done’.

We must get rid of any idea that prayer (for example) changes God in the sense that we twist God’s arm so that now he will get on with the task of saving my friend Johnny. God wants all to be saved and come to a knowledge of the truth – thus I cannot buy into the choice of God from all eternity as to who is saved (maybe a post one day on predestination, election etc?).

God and humanity… Our vote is big when it comes to heaven’s activity. Prayer does not change God but it does change God’s activity and level of presence. It is so powerful – situations can change and in the process we change. And of course key to all this is that ‘earth’ is given to us, and we have consistently ‘fallen’ thus our sphere is that of coming out from under the one to whom we gave authority and nestling under the one who has authority ‘in heaven and on earth’. Prayer is to God but is to remove all areas that are under the authority of the ‘prince of this world’. All of that changes at the hour of the resurrection and we live the other side of that… and yet this ‘evil age’ continues. In comes prayer!

Next post I will jump into a reflection on the phase of my life when I was leading prayer teams (‘sowing seeds for revival’) to many cities in the UK and beyond.

Prophecy… a great era

I am not planning to make an incredible post on ‘prophecy and the prophetic’ (as if I could!). There are so many testimonies of prophetic words that open up what has been previously shut, or confirm what has been carried during a prior season, but it is not that that I want to reflect on.

I first encountered a serious level of the prophetic in 1981 when I sat and observed a prophet from the USA who had come through the Latter Rain Movement and he prophesied over a number of people that I knew (and he did not) and who were in prominent positions within the charismatic world in the UK. I had no idea how he knew what he knew.

Since then I have had the privilege of witnessing many such times when that has taken place… but here we are some 35+ years since those days. I am deeply grateful for that background, but also am aware that not only has some decades passed but we are in a new context. Last week I was deeply provoked when I was told that someone who Gayle and I prophesied over is ‘waiting for the fulfilment’ which of course is what we have to do but part of waiting often challenges expectations.

When we were searching for a property in Madrid we received a word that contained the phrase that ‘it would be bigger than we think’. Well, we had been looking for a small property and with all of them we were outpriced. If unable to afford something smaller then there is not too much of a difference when looking for something bigger – both scenarios are in the beyond your resources area. We opened the search wider (we knew the ‘where’ we should be) and as we looked at bigger apartments and still nothing connected. An important principle in all things prophetic is that in all things ‘the peace of God is the final arbitrator in our hearts’. So nothing connected. Then one day an agent said ‘we have this place you can look at’. It was as small as anything we had looked at before, but was at a lower price as it had many issues on it (Including that the only reference to the owner that we found on a search was ‘do not deal with this man as he is a thief’ – perhaps more on that later). We thought we might as well go and look as there is nothing else we are looking at on that day.

We walked in and instantly knew we were to go for this one as we could see that we could get the entire government and judiciary of Spain inside that apartment – not literally, but present to leverage. (Location is vital.)

Bigger than you think. So often the issue is our thinking. We hear something and it might connect with our thinking at that point of time, but we have to move our thinking forward as the future context will often be different when we finally connect. Prophecy comes at point ‘A’… fulfilment is at point ‘C’ in our lives; expectation is a fulfilment in our present context and if we hold on too tightly to how it will be we can fail to be ready or fail to see the opportunity for fulfilment when it comes.

A prophetic word comes and then if there is to be a fulfilment there has to be an interior work in us; there has to be a preparation in us so that we be ready.

Language in the prophetic can also be misunderstood – bigger than you think = more square metres; and the fulfilment was something with less square metres but appropriate for the task in hand.

I am aware that there were many wonderful words to numerous people from 1990 onwards, and that since then there has been many shifts in the wider context. This is a major factor as if expectations are that fulfilments will be in a previous context there will be disappointments and we will be waiting and waiting.

This aspect of the change of context is something that goes way beyond prophetic words and fulfilments and is an aspect that will come through as I reflect.

Prophecy and control

Prophetic words and revelation that communicate can make an amazing difference to a life or a situation and probably in the next post will develop that side. However… and sadly I also have to touch on the levels of control that I have confronted – blatantly in the numerous years when I travelled to Brazil and perhaps not so blatant in other places.

I still respond to requests from certain situations to bring some prophetic revelation and always make sure that the person on the receiving end knows they are the ‘boss’. They have every right to reject what is being brought, and they are not about to receive something that is controlling or manipulative. Paul describes one of the ‘works of the flesh’ as witchcraft and anything that seeks to control, manipulate or dictate in the context of interpersonal relationships is indeed a work of the flesh. It might come in the form of a charismatic gift… in the form of prophecy, but nevertheless it is ‘false prophecy’. False prophecy is not that which is wrong, it is a spirit. If someone consistently gets it ‘wrong’ then they need help and probably need to take a step back for a season – but that in itself is not false prophecy.

[An aside: one of the theological errors I believe, and something that has been popularised in many charismatic / third wave circles is that the prophets of the Old Testament spoke the very words of God, and the apostles of the New Testament did likewise, whereas the New Testament prophets spoke relatively. This does not stand up to biblical examination and I am sure the original proponent of this was operating from a presupposition concerning the inerrancy of Scripture – similar to one of my earlier posts about my days in New Testament introduction classes and the ever-present drive to prove that each and every NT book was ‘apostolic’. The Bible does not need our help!!!]

‘We had a person through who to each person he gave out their social security number and then what followed was a prophetic word, but each word was manipulative – even some at the level of threat’… ‘if you do not receive this word then this will happen…’

The above was reported to me. Perhaps the person received the numbers from heaven (I question that) but irrespective of the source the response was not one of faith and freedom but bondage. In Brazil I always held one session on false prophecy and at the close always held a response time seeking to insist that if they had been subject to such an experience that we would pray. I tried to make the response very tight so excluded where they had received something that was not accurate, or they knew that whatever they had received did not have a hold on them. On average 25-35% of those present would respond. The biggest battle was getting people to the place where they verbally rejected what had been given as they had to confront the fear of ‘but if I reject this what will happen’. Following the renunciation I would always call for healing – and sometimes as many as 50-100 people would testify to healing – such as being able to move their arm, leg or body in a free way for the first time in a decade or more.

Prophecy is never about the person giving the ‘word’. As soon as that becomes the case a door is open to all sorts of problems. Peter was asked to ‘feed my sheep’. The ministry platform has opened up the reverse of that… those listening, listen with awe and are impressed (‘duped’) and the person (ego) being fed is the platform person.

I believe in prophetic gifts. We are in a new time, a new situation, and this requires new protocols and also (re-)new(ed) people. Being impressed by the superstar is not what will bring the kingdom of heaven into reach but will only serve to keep the body immature and the remainder of society bereft of heaven’s perspective.

An interlude

I am making an interlude in my pre-70 posts (resuming tomorrow) as we (the corporate ‘we’) are beginning to see an important shift in our world.

Quite some time ago Gayle had a very significant dream – she has many but I have never witnessed her so impacted as a result. The dream as we understand it focused on Europe as the place where a response took place and it was a huge protest about the situation for the Palestinians in Gaza. We are beginning to see this right now – and we have to have huge respect for the protests within Israel itself – in cities, in concerts that suddenly erupt in protest, in airports. It is happening, or at least beginning to happen.

I appreciate there are differing views on Israel, the land and ‘eschatological’ events but currently the level of genocide with the complicities of many of our nations and mega-companies is beyond intolerable.

The second part of the dream was as a result of the European voice on Palestine was that of a serious shift in the banking / economic world. The focus was on the children. A major ‘god’ to be confronted in the Old Testament was Moloch and it is the continuation of that alliance that is what drives so much of the global western economy. That ‘spirit’ is placated and will bless today if we are willing to sacrifice the next generation (child sacrifice). We have to see a return to ‘seedtime and harvest’ – we sow today for the future harvest, so much of what underpins the economic western structure is that we borrow from a future that has not yet appeared to fund today. Global debt… If we as individuals were to run our finances in the same way we would be imprisoned.

I pause on my reflections because soon I will not be here (even if I live to my 132 fantasy age!!!) but it is all about the children. ‘Take off your shoes Mr. Banks and play with the children’ was where Gayle’s dream ended. ‘And a child will lead them’ (Is. 11:6).

Follow the money… otherwise we will not see clearly and will not sow to a future where (the subsequent verses) come into view:

They will not hurt or destroy
    on all my holy mountain,
for the earth will be full of the knowledge of the Lord
    as the waters cover the sea.

We have entered a major crack in time. 2008, 2020 and now 2025. We watch, bear witness.

July 29 2004 – Feb 14 2025

Dates. July 29th, 2004 the diagnosis for Sue is that she had cancer in her body. She is 49, her dad having died at age 50 from cancer. In her journal on 28th July she wrote – I do not want to face my worst fear. On 29th she wrote – I have faced my worst fear and it is not as bad as I thought. The diagnosis was given – I was devastated, she not. The first ‘major’ (excuse the inadequate adjective) healing I saw was of a Philipino woman in Tooting, London, who was in the final stages of cancer. She was present with family members who had come over for her final weeks. I prayed for her and the colour of her skin changed. Next day she drove her husband’s BMW car that he had bought while she was ill and had never been able to drive. She drove to a Catholic church to pray and give thanks. The priest asked her what was going on – he did not know how to respond! But now this was Sue.

In the fall a friend from Argentina came to me and said he had been praying for Sue and had seen the following. She was in a small private meeting in which there were words spoken that entered into the pit of her stomach and rose up into her chest area and exited at the top of her back just below the neck. He said that he and his wife, Sylvia, would come and pray if 1) she confirmed that happened exactly as he described and 2) that as soon as I shared this with her that her fist words would be ‘I will tell you exactly when that was’. I thought well there are no secrets so no chance and then when I repeated what Victor had said, so that he could check I had it accurately, I pointed to my chest area and was maybe 2 centimetres to the left of where he had indicated. He replied with if she says it was where you pointed then I am wrong and will not come to pray. I thought now double no chance!

[An aside – maybe we have witnessed (I overstate) where someone declares there is a man with a torn tendon in his right elbow… eventually a women with a dislocated left knee is healed!]

I went back home and Sue sat on one settee. I shared. Her first words were ‘I will tell you exactly when that was’. OOOOF.

Victor and Sylvia came and prayed. The improvement was incredible. In December we had the second scan and waited in the waiting room, and waited… They came eventually and explained the delay. They said they had received the results but knew that the results could not be from the woman they were looking at who looked as well as you or I. They said that the technicians had made a mistake and sent it back for another response. But that they said that in spite of treatment the situation was worse than before.

I learnt so much in those months. Worst time of my life – maybe also the best. Encounters with God in abundance. I remember unloading the dishwasher. Only I was in the house and as I bent down this hand came on my back – so strongly I jumped up, instantly without fear or concern. I knew somehow this was an angelic visitation. This strength flooded into my body. I walked to the hospice about 1km away with literal physical strength flowing through my body. I reached the hospice (Sue was by now in a coma) and there was an open Bible with a note that the person left saying ‘I read this for you today’.

Then this humanlike figure touched me again and gave me strength. He said, ‘Don’t be afraid, friend. Peace. Everything is going to be all right. Take courage. Be strong.’ (Dan 10:18-19).

OOOOFFFF.

Two days later (Feb 14th – the only Valentine card she never opened on the side) Sue was breathing with her lungs clearly filled with liquid so the breathing was heavily laboured. I said to her if you want me to I will release you (first time I ever said that or had contemplated saying that). And as clear as any voice could be immediately I heard,

No not now and if you ask I will send an angel to cleanse her lungs for you.’

My reply – if that is on offer I am asking.

Bizarrely I thought the liquid in the lungs would somehow be syphoned out and would enter the catheter bag (I am no medic!). I looked for the bag but as she had had received no liquid in days the bag was not hanging on the side of the bed but tucked under her thigh. I took it and hung it on the side of the bed, and 90 minutes later it was full. I called a nurse who looked at me sceptically but then quickly removed the bag and replaced it with another one. I called her again maybe another 90 minutes later and as she took at away in the corridor the nurse was asked by another nurse – where has that come from? When she said Sue Scott a discussion ensued as this was not considered possible.

Sue’s breathing was now perfect.

From July 29th to Feb 14th had been a long journey, but at last we were there. At 17:10 my phone went with a text message from someone with credible status. It read, ‘Last night I dreamt and Sue was present in a room and giving thanks to all those present from around the world who had been praying for her.’ I knew we were there – the timing was amazing. 12 minutes later she breathed her last breath.

Months later I realised that the Holy Spirit had said ‘cleanse her lungs for you‘. Not for Sue, for where she was headed she did not need lungs related to this earthly age to be cleansed – it was for me.

On that last morning a young woman who lived about an hour away woke and came downstairs to say that she had woken to Sue Scott’s voice (she had never met Sue) who said – My Jesus I am coming to you, tell my family I was not afraid, look after my family.

In the months before Sue died there was an evening when those somewhat younger than us came to pray for her. She said, ‘before you pray I do not want anyone to pray to stop me dying’ (I am somewhat shocked to hear this). She continued, ‘We are all dying. You are here to pray that I live. If you discern that I have purpose to live then you can pray’.

I thought about Moses’ words:

I set before you life and death, choose life so that you may live.

He did not say avoid death and you will live. Avoiding death is not living… becoming increasingly a life giving spirit is to live.

To say that I learnt so much would be an understatement.

Do I understand all that took place. No, but am forever grateful to God for the deep intimate companionship along the way.

Could the outcome have been different? Perhaps, but the ‘coulds and shoulds’ of life can stop us moving forward. Never easy but the companionship of heaven is deeply more life-giving than the understanding of all things.

In a personal post like this it would not be possible to thank everyone for the practical and prayerful support during and after those months. I am eternally grateful to the scores of people.

In Jesus’ name

I had a phase when I focused a lot on praying for those who were sick. I initially asked the Lord for one person per week and after a few weeks someone would come to my door, then I upped the request to 3 a week and the same began to happen, and then…

I still have a simplicity about healing… how would the historical Jesus of Nazareth respond to a request for healing – the one who is the same yesterday, today and will be consistently the same tomorrow. There might be many reasons why a person is not healed but I do not think it is a good idea to start with that!

I could recount many stories but – hopefully not being foolish but helping to raise realistic expectations – will throw in two here.

Back in the day of ‘healing meetings’… and in this new setting, a setting of life, we have to find a new way, but back in the day as these posts are reflections that maybe I can pull together the threads in days to come. Edith, in her early 60s came in sitting in a wheelchair and I immediately turned to my colleague and said – that woman will walk tonight. The story was written up in a national newspaper (The Daily Mail – not a paper I would recommend!). I later found out that for 19 years she had never walked unaided, 16 in a wheelchair and living in a home for those severely physically challenged. By the time I prayed for her she was in advanced stage of Multiple Sclerosis. Her eye sight had virtually all gone, her vocal cords destroyed. She walked and returned to ‘normal’ life, she soon left the care home and lived some 15 kilometres from where I lived. She had to be medically examined to have her driving license restored and the report was – other than your medical records we have to say there is no trace of any symptom in her body, no residual evidence that she had ever had MS!

I got to know her some and found out that she had been prayed for on numerous occasions over the previous decades with seemingly no result. Two options… someone comes along who knows what others before did not know, or (the reality) one more prayer tipped the scales. There the challenge remains. Persistence and certainly no hollow promises, and no action as if we know everything.

A mother brought her 8 year old daughter to me. I sat with them in an office. She had a rare disease and at its worst she had to be carried in a duvet from one place to another such was the pain to even touch her. I simply said – if Jesus were here physically, but it is me who is here so let’s see. I simply prayed ‘Lord Jesus it would be great if you touched this young girl today’… I held her hand and after a minute or so said, ‘many times when one is being healed there is a sensation that is experienced in the body – often heat or tingling or something similar’. The girl replied with – I have felt something happen in all my joints. My reply – you never know, let’s see.

I had a letter from the mother a few days later. When we left your office my daughter said she had never let this well in a long time. Next day she cycled 800 metres, not having been able to cycle in weeks. Then later she communicated that the clinic that she was under communicated that they could not explain the shift, but that their conclusion was that the cumulative effect of the different drugs they had prescribed had overnight somehow catalysed the healing. Maybe… probably not!

I could recount hundreds of similar situations, and maybe one last one in this post. In Brazil at the back to the auditorium there was a major commotion with people gathered all around. I said go find out what has happened. A woman born without fingerprints had received finger prints! Necessary? Probably not – but what a testimony to the restoration of identity.

I don’t know too much, have also prayed with people who have had no improvement; sadly lost Sue when she was only 50. But I remain a convinced charismatic, that there are gifts that God releases.

I doubt if I will know a lot more once I travel beyond the 70 mark, and I hope in recounting just 3 stories that I will not come out the other side to be more foolish than I am. My motivation – God is not one of us, but breaks in to our world over and over again. We rejoice with every testimony, we weep with those who do not experience something amazing (Heb. 11) knowing that as we walk together and make room for God there are all kinds of possibilities… ‘What if?’ possibilities.

Charismatic Gifts

Not ‘charismatic’ in the sense of larger than life personality, but charis-matic: charis being the word for grace, and Paul in Galatians expresses an expectation of the norm among them in a letter that is strong about ‘grace’:

Well then, does God supply you with the Spirit and work miracles among you by your doing the works of the law or by your believing what you heard? (Gal. 3:5).

Present tense and ongoing without Paul (an apostle) being present. I am an unrepentant ‘charismatic’ with a belief and desire to see the norm, but also acknowledge the abuse that has at times accompanied that which is popularly called ‘the supernatural’. And in these next few posts there is a backdrop that supernatural signs do not attest to the character of the person or any particular practice. There can be many theological debates about Scripture, but ortho-praxy is as high – at times higher – than orthodoxy.

I have hesitated about writing these particular posts and they will be highly selective as to what content they carry. I decided to write with regard to what is commonly termed ‘the supernatural’ as it part of my journey and I am and remain a convinced ‘charismatic’ with a passion to see the authentic miraculous increase.

Acts begins with – ‘of all that Jesus began to do and to teach’ which I consider is the straightforward and best translation, hence Acts is a record of Jesus continuing to do and to teach. The context moves from the Jewish world to the Graeco-Roman but the ‘doing’ continues while the ‘teaching’ finds a new context.

My hesitation in writing? There are clear records in Scripture of the miraculous but Paul felt forced to defend himself when he shared his journey to the third heaven and I think a fair reading of the passage is that he was still not convinced he did the right thing in sharing what he shared. It is too easy to get the ‘wow’ response. Also the testimony books gather together the stories and leave out the stories that don’t fit, leaving the author as the hero and the rest of us with false aspirations. So it is tricky to put this post together – but I will have a go with the hope it will provoke, and perhaps stir faith also.

Let me start by recounting with a question I asked Michael Kolisang (he was the first person that Reinhard Bonnke saw come to Christ when he came to Africa, and then Michael became the co-evangelist for some 18 years, and during those years he was the one who prayed for healings). Actually I will respond with two questions I asked him on two different occasions. First one I thought was superfluous – are healings ‘easier’ in Africa or in the UK? His response surprised me – I don’t know, he said, no-one has asked me to push night after night, only then could I tell as breaktrhoughs don’t come instantly. I think this bears with the historical records from people like George Jeffries – night after night and then… (Of course there is a further challenge for us, Michael’s context was meeting after meeting… ours has shifted.)

The second question was – in all your experience if you were to reduce it down to one piece of advice for those who wished to pray for those who were sick what would that be? He explained it this way:

Every time I lay my hands on someone I think – if God does not touch them they will not be healed but what if God were to touch them when I lay hands on them? Every time I lay my hands on them there is an amazing possibility that was not there before.

What if… that is something we need to live with in every situation. There is always a God opportunity in every situation.

The Sunday after I arrived home having asked him that question a woman came to me to ask if I would pray that she might conceive. I said sure… then she said you do need to know that I have had surgery and no longer have functioning reproductive organs. Instantly I remembered what Michael had said a few days earlier… ‘what if God were to touch you when I pray for you?’ Just under a year later she returned with photo of baby which I still have.

Another time Michael gave me another key. He explained it by overstating his experience. In a crusade, he said, we would hear a person shout out ‘I was blind and I have my sight back’ so we would pray for those who were confined to wheelchairs… none were healed. Next crusade someone would spontaneously walk, so we would pray for those who were blind… none were healed. Michael said never focus on what you consider God is not doing, focus on what God is doing and where he is involved, follow the finger of God.

Theology gets us so far. ‘What if’ gets us a lot further!

I will follow this post with another one on the same theme and hope not to be more foolish than I normally am!

Perspectives